Number :10
Golfer:    “I think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.”
Caddy:    “Think you can keep your head down that long, sir?”

Number : 9
Golfer:    “I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.”
Caddy:    “Try heaven sir, you’ve already moved most of the earth.”

Number : 8
Golfer:    “Do you think my game is improving?”
Caddy:    “Yes sir . . . . You miss the ball much closer now.”

Number : 7
Golfer:    “Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?”
Caddy:    “Eventually, sir.”

Number : 6
Golfer:    “You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.”
Caddy:    “I don’t think so sir . . . That would be too much of a coincidence.”

Number : 5
Golfer:    “Please stop checking your watch all the time. It’s too much of a distra_ction.”
Caddy:    “It’s not a watch sir – it’s a compass.”

Number : 4
Golfer:    “How do you like my game?”
Caddy:    “It’s very good sir – but personally, I prefer golf.”

Number : 3
Golfer:    “Do you think it’s a sin to play on Sunday?
Caddy:    “I’m afraid the way you play sir, it’s a sin on any day.”

Number : 2
Golfer:    “This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.”
Caddy:    “But this isn’t the golf course . . .  We left that an hour ago sir.”

And the Number : 1 . . . . Best Caddy Comment:
Golfer:    “That can’t be my ball, it’s too old.”
Caddy:    “It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.”

Bonus . . .
An old favorite . . . about the Golfer who has been slicing off the tee at every hole . . .

He finally gives up and asks his long suffering caddy . . .
Golfer:    “Can you see any obvious problems . . . ?”
Caddy:    “There’s a piece of s**t on the end of your club.”
The Golfer picks up his club and cleans the club face . . .

Caddy:    “No sir, it’s at the other end”